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I woke up in the morning
And the 8-year-old was screaming
So I let him have a warning
While I called my secretary
And the iron started steaming
And my gams were looking hairy
So I pressed my husband’s chinos
While I shaved my legs

I kissed my husband, off he
Went And then I ground the beans to
Percolate the morning coffee
And I packed a couple lunches
And I somehow had the means to
Fry the sausages in bunches
And I fed my two bambinos
While I ate my eggs

I don’t need help
Thanks for asking
I’m the Queen of Multitasking


The traffic jam was crawling
So I read a couple memos
And the news was too apalling
So I booted my computer
And I edited the demos
And cut off a motor scooter
When I turned my little Geo
Down a one-way street

I hollered out a greeting
And the message light was blinking
And I held a status meeting
And I fired my secretary
And the finance team was thinking
That it wasn’t necessary
To go flying down to Rio
For the staff retreat

I don’t need help
Thanks for asking
I’m the Queen of Multitasking


Some say it’s hard to keep each ball in the air
The difficulty’s overrated
No chance I’ll let them drop and fall in my chair
If I stay highly caffeinated


I pumped some iron while
I was casually reading
Through some resumes on file
To replace my secretary
Then I had to start the meeting
And I conferenced Buenos Aires
With the team in Sacramento
On the naval base

I did the presentation
And approved a couple logos
Then I made a reservation
For a charitable luncheon
Then I listened to The Go-Gos
While I did some number crunching
And I ordered up polenta
From the Spanish place

I don’t need help
Thanks for asking
I’m the Queen of Multitasking

song pic

A friend used the phrase in an e-mail and I asked permission to use it as a lyric title. The rhyme scheme was maddening but I fought my way through it. (ABACBCDE FGFHGHDE)

I wrote the melody and chorded it. Darryl Gregory of Blue Cave Studios fixed it up and recorded it, with Lisa Murray singing.

crumpled paper