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THE GIRL (2006)

OK, check this out, you’re sitting in jail
But you will prevail
You dig a tunnel, you make your break
Wind up by a lake
You don’t know where you are
You’re saying Dude, where’s my car?
But turn around when you hear the tires squeal
Look who’s at the wheel

OK, try this on, the kingpin’s on the stand
The verdict’s at hand
Where’s the document to make him pay
Or will he get away
You’re the prosecutor, going for the glory
It’s another gripping courtroom story
But turn around, breathe a sigh of relief
Look who’s got your briefs

I’ll be The Girl
I’ll take second billing
Casting couch?
Baby, I’m willing
Let me play the love scene
Look up on the screen
You’re the hero, baby
Let me be The Girl

Michelle Pfeiffer wants character development
She wants backstory and Oscar-worthy lines
Meryl wants discussions on her motivations
Just give me action, dress me to the nines
Come on, star in my movie, baby
You’ll get all the best-lit shots
If you star in my movie, baby
I’ll give you close-ups, and I mean lots

OK, run this down, the aliens attack
You’re a Man in Black
Your partner’s missing, it’s up to you
But there’s quite a few
You’re outnumbered, twenty to one
You reload your plasma gun
But turn around, and take it all in stride
Look who’s by your side

(repeat chorus, baby)

This doesn’t quite work. Michele Pfeiffer said in an interview (for WOLF) that she didn’t want to do the movie at first because she didn’t want to be "The Girl" -- she wanted more backstory and character.

I tried to write a bouncy girlpop lyric based on that concept, but it’s a little obscure and doesn’t quite work.

crumpled paper